Throw in the towel

In the last few days, I have had situations that demanded strength from within. Being a man, and living in a society and a generation where you are expected to be strong and to have all the answers, there is a tendency to put myself under a heavy pressure. I can try to fulfill society’s expectations of me by trying to hold together what I cannot hold together. I can try to appear like I have it all sorted, when, deep down I know that I do not. Deep down, I know that I need help. Deep down, I know that my manhood is not self existent or self sustained. I know deep down that my strength is dependent, my strength is weak.

It seems to me that my life will be easier if I just throw in the towel.

One of my heroes in scriptures is King David. He was a man’s man and a woman’s man if there is such a phrase. He killed Goliath and subdued all the nations around. Yet He would break down and cry. Why must a man “have it all together” when he does not? Why can’t a man cry? Why can’t a man throw in the towel? David confessed weakness, he confessed total dependency, on God. What is wrong with that? Were we not created to be images of God, meaning we need to be wholly dependent on the person whose image we are? Why must I behave like I can handle it when I know that I cannot?

I will throw in the towel. I am a man, but I will throw in the towel. Yes, throwing in the towel is an acknowledgement of weakness, of inadequacy. Throwing in the towel is an acknowledgement that there is a rock higher than I. King David said something that is taboo today,

“From the end of the earth will I cry unto thee, when my heart is overwhelmed:
lead me to the rock that is higher than I.”

Today, especially as men, we will not cry unto anybody, our hearts cannot be overwhelmed and there is nothing higher than us. Little wonder we commit suicide. How can I not hate living when I am my own rock and I come face to face with my inadequacy. Throw in the towel. I know this is very contrary to motivational talk, but how about accepting defeat? How about accepting that I am in need. Truly, life is impossible for me and it is meant to be impossible. When all seems to fall apart, all is meant to fall apart! We are not the force that keeps anything together, not even our own lives, our families, our societies. When things fall apart, it needs to be a reminder that there is One that is higher than I, in union with whom all things consist, and I need Him.

God has made our lives easy by making his demands impossible. For example, how humanly possible is it for a man like King David to see a truly beautiful woman and not strip her in your mind if she was not already stripped? Yet Jesus Christ said, the deed is done when it is done internally. Ha!!! I know there are very strong men but I identify more with King David. Sorry, I am throwing in the towel. God has made our lives easy by making life impossible. The only response that guarantees ease and peace is for me to throw in the towel, to let God be God. Quit trying to be God. We are so weak that we cannot be God over our own lives talk much less of over our spouses, children, organizations or societies.

We have a Father who will not step in to our lives until we throw in the towel and acknowledge our need for Him. It is a mystery and I wrote about it in the mystery of weakness. Our strength as men and as humans is in weakness. We can be perpetually strong only when we are perpetually weak. I have said about myself that I am so weak that even a common blog post requires me being inspired and downloading from source. I try not to try writing anything because when I am trying, I am toiling and likely disconnected from source.

When I am connected, I am surrendered to the Source that expresses Himself through me and I do not struggle because I am out of the way. I am inspired when I am a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable. My Pastor, Bishop Oyedepo once said, “You do not have to be smart, just be connected.” Phew! It is completely liberating to know that I do not need to have a solution in my head, all I need is a heart to heart connection with the source of solutions.

This may all seem outrageous but check out Jesus Christ. God incarnate. Yet, he said, “I can of my ownself do nothing…” Is that not an acknowledgement of inadequacy, weakness and dependence? Is that not throwing in the towel?

14 thoughts on “Throw in the towel

  1. Thanks for your comments Sis. Our strength indeed is in our weakness. When I acknowledge my weakness and dependency on God, I am (before God) acknowledging that I am strong because He whose strength is perfected in weakness becomes my strength.

  2. I am too. Everyday. I am not going to try handling my life by myself, because I cannot. I am throwing in the towel. I am stronger for it, infinitely stronger for it because my strength is not mine but God's. What beats that?

  3. David, I am inspired by how effortlessly you summarized my blog post in two sentences. Throwing in the towel here means sitting down and learning from you.

  4. hello toluhow are you?throwing in the towel is a sign of strength and total dependence on the almightys ability to guide, support, provide and take charge of all thats happening around us.throwing in the towel in this context makes us understand the need to have our faith anchored on to his truth and this reassures us even in difficult times.take care of yourself and enjoy the rest of the day

  5. I trust you are well too, Ayo. Thank you for capturing that. Throwing in the towel in this context does not leave us helpless but connects us with Omnipotence, thereby making us supernaturally strong and supernaturally helped, in spite of us and in spite of all that is happening around us.

  6. I read this article when it was first published and like I normally do, I take my time to digest it and then re-read it. Each time I read it, I see something new, or something re-newed.And what kept turning in my spirit was when you first said: {"He killed Goliath and subdued all the nations around. Yet He would BREAK DOWN AND CRY. Why must a man "have it all together" when he does not? Why can't a man cry? Why can't a man throw in the towel? David confessed weakness, he confessed total dependency, on God. WHAT IS WRONG WITH THAT?"}I suppose God specializes in oxymorons where the foolish things of the world ALWAYS, without fail, confounds and renders the self-confessed wise men speechless and stupefied. I see here that David holds the secret to God's heart…embrace God's oxymoron. Be the weepy, needy yet mighty man of valour. By the way, who defined manhood and established it's parameters? God did and that qualifies David as a man after His heart. I am comforted and challenged that I can run to God, need Him desperately, gasp and pant after Him, weep and totally depend on Him and yet know that in His eyes, I am a woman of substance and might*** Yet again you said: {"God has made our lives easy by making his demands impossible."} I have wrestled with this over and over again. In the depths of my being, He whispers, THE WAY TO THE LARGE PLACE IS THROUGH A NARROW PATH. Oh, how I hate the dark, narrow windy path that seems to lead nowhere yet I know if I keep going, just one more step, I'm closer to my place of rest.And finally, you said,(in the little pop up anecdote) Jesus, like David, had promiscuity in His genes. He was tempted in every way and yet sinned not. That was mind blowing. Our past, history, weakness, genes do not define who we are or our destiny. They simply the tools meant to shape us and give us a glorious end. Amen!I was thoroughly blessed and humbled by this write-up. God bless.

  7. This is an addendum to my post. You took it further than I did. Thank you. Like all your comments, I need to read and read again because I have more to digest from this than I have to respond.By the way, what I put in the anecdote came to me one day while having a conversation with Tolulope of Rahab Memoirs. It did stagger my mind and your second to last paragraph gives me better understanding.

  8. Today, especially as men, we will not cry unto anybody, our hearts cannot be overwhelmed and there is nothing higher than us. Little wonder we commit suicide.Bros mi , thank you for this line , highly inspired , what kind of generation do we have that tells that we are self sufficient , am not . Like i wrote in my new post ''God is my daddy and talking about needy individuals, I top the list , am incredibly needy , wanting attention all the time , I have discovered that no matter how capable a human may be , they can’t just keep up with my neediness only my Daddy can do that''.I humbly throw in the towel to God and allow Him to mould me and make me His totally and thoroughly. Thank you bros mi.

  9. The closer I get to God, the more of a cry-baby i become. God touched me in a special way; He made my hard heart tender. I throw in the towel daily, I die to myself daily. I dethrone myself so that He can sit on His throne and be my Rock, my Savior and My Lord.I will not make it without constantly acknowledging my limitations and frailty.When i throw in the towel, He steps in and take charge, Hallelujah.

  10. I love your last statement – "when I throw in the towel, he steps in and takes charge…" I believe that is what He wants from us and that is how He made us to function. It is an irony. We win when we throw in the towel. Thank you Buky.

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